
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/2365643.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Underage
  Category:
      F/M, M/M
  Fandom:
      BBC_Sherlock
  Relationship:
      Mycroft_Holmes/Greg_Lestrade, Mycroft_Holmes/Mummy_(Sherlock), Sherlock
      Holmes/John_Watson
  Character:
      Mycroft_Holmes, Greg_Lestrade, Mummy_(Sherlock), Sherlock_Holmes, John
      Watson
  Additional Tags:
      Parent/Child_Incest, Childhood_Sexual_Abuse, Extremely_Dubious_Consent,
      Eating_Disorders
  Collections:
      Holmestice_2014_June_Fanworks_Exchange
  Stats:
      Published: 2014-09-27 Words: 1442
****** Did Anybody Hear The Things We Didn't Mean ******
by monkiainen
Summary
     Despite what everyone else thinks, Mycroft loves his little brother.
Notes
     For
     [http://l-stat.livejournal.net/img/userinfo.gif?v=17080?v=119.8]
xfdryad for the Summer Sherlock Holmes Solstice Exchange @ [http://l-
stat.livejournal.net/img/community.gif?v=556?v=119.8]holmestice
My recipient wanted 'Mycroft n Sherlock love each other, really' type of fic,
and... well, my muse decided to interpret their wishes in a very twisted way.
Please note that all the warnings are there for a reason - this is not a happy
story by any means.
Jocasta [dʒoʊˈkæstə]complex
1. The domineering and intense, but non-incestuous love that a mother has for
an intelligent son, and an often absent or weak father figure.

2. The incestuous sexual desire of a mother towards her son.
                                     * * *
Mycroft Holmes does not cry.
For if he cries, his mother will come to his bedroom late at night and comfort
him.
                                     * * *
Mycroft Holmes is an enigma. A man who many people know, and yet know nothing
about him. There is only one person who knows the man behind the carefully
constructed layers upon layers of self-preservation – Mycroft himself. A
certain grey-haired Detective Inspector of New Scotland Yard comes close, but
even he doesn’t know everything. Greg knows there are things he can’t know
about Mycroft, for their safety. It should bother him more than it does, but
for some reason it doesn’t. He is just happy to have at least a part of Mycroft
for himself. They have come a long way since they started casually sleeping
with each other. What used to be a mutual stress relief is now a full-fledged
relationship, with all its ups and downs.
Sometimes Mycroft is caught in a middle of nightmare, tossing and turning
restlessly in their bed. Afterwards Mycroft is skittish, flinching when Greg
tries to comfort him, bordering on catatonic. Greg wished Mycroft could tell
him what is wrong.
                                     * * *
Once upon a time there was a small boy called Mycroft. He was smarter than most
children of his age, a quality that made his mother praise him. It was only
natural when your mother is a genius herself.
His mother loved him very, very much. So much that she rather slept in her
son’s room instead of the bedroom she shared with her husband. It made Mycroft
feel important and cherished – his mother loved him the most.
At first it was just his mother sleeping in the same bed with him, keeping
monsters away. Sometimes his mother would pet his hair, telling him what a good
boy he was and kissing him goodnight. Nothing more, nothing less.
Her hands were the wandering kind. Stroking his tummy after too much candy,
caressing his thighs, fondling his most private parts. At first Mycroft was
confused, but then Mummy told him it was alright because he was such a bright
and good little boy. Only good little boys were taken care of like that by
their Mummies. Mummy would always love him the most.
                                     * * *
Every time they visit the notorious Mummy (and the husband), Mycroft is even
more polite than usual. Greg just can’t understand what is going with the
Holmes brothers and their mother, as she is the most pleasant person he has met
for a while. It’s a wonder such a kind woman like her has produced such
obnoxious sons. Maybe they had a falling out when Mycroft came out of the
closet. They wouldn’t be the first family to have a crisis over someone’s
sexual orientation.
Later on, when Mycroft is off who knows where with Sherlock, Greg emboldens
himself and asks Mummy what her thoughts were when she found out her oldest son
is gay. She smiles gently, telling Greg that she was and is perfectly fine with
the fact that she is the only woman her son has and will ever love.
                                     * * *
Mycroft couldn’t understand why the great love his Mummy had for him had to be
kept a secret. But then Mummy told him they didn’t want to hurt Daddy’s
feelings and Mycroft understood it because he was so bright.
Somewhere deep inside Mycroft knows that what Mummy is doing to him at nights
is not right. But he is too embarrassed to let anyone know about the truth, for
he should have known from the start. He’s a genius, after all.
                                     * * *
Mycroft and Sherlock are having a row, again. Although calling it a row is
overstating – all they ever do is that Mycroft tries to tell Sherlock what to
do and Sherlock refuses to listen. Greg must admit though that having John
around has changed things for the better. Not much, but so that brothers
actually agree on some things once and a while.
Greg wonders if Mycroft and Sherlock even know what it’s like to have a loving
and supporting brother, instead of one that belittles you every step of the
way.
                                     * * *
When Mycroft is ten years old, Mummy gets pregnant after many years of
miscarriages and heartbreak. When his younger brother is born, Mycroft thinks
he’s the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.
They name him William Sherlock Scott Holmes. Mycroft wonders if his little
brother is going to be as bright as him. For if he is, then Mycroft must
protect him. It’s his duty as an older brother. ’Please let him be smarter than
me, please don’t let him believe the lies Mummy is telling me at nights’
Mycroft prays silently. It’s not the future he wants his baby brother to have.
                                     * * *
Sherlock claims that Mycroft is only interested in his career and influence
among the people. To Mycroft, people are only pawns in a never-ending game of
fame and fortune, of knowledge and power. Sherlock despises his older brother
and his ways.
Sherlock might be blind when it comes to his brother, but Greg can see how much
Sherlock’s words are actually hurting Mycroft. He wonders, yet again, why
Mycroft can’t show Sherlock how much he really cares. Later on, when Sherlock
has stormed off, Greg tries to discuss the matter with Mycroft to no avail.
It’s a mystery to be solved, and Greg is determined to make things work between
the brothers because he’s tired of seeing the hurt in Mycroft’s eyes every time
Sherlock insults him.
                                     * * *
Years go by, and Mummy’s visits to Mycroft’s bedroom at nights continue.
Mycroft makes sure that he mocks his little brother and his intelligence every
time has the chance – if her mother thinks that Mycroft is the more intelligent
one, she will leave Sherlock alone. Mycroft goes even that far to suggest that
Sherlock would probably be better off at boarding school, away from Mummy’s
disapproving eyes. Sherlock away would also mean more time together for Mummy
and Mycroft, without the fear of being interrupted by a child demanding his
mother’s attention.
Mycroft congratulates himself when he has successfully alienated Mummy from
Sherlock. The things he would do out of love for his little brother have no
limits. At least Sherlock will be safe, and hopefully will find love someday.
Mycroft suffers silently inside his head, when Mummy lowers herself to his
erect cock, riding herself into an orgasm. He feels nothing.
                                     * * *
Greg loves making love with Mycroft. The sounds he makes when he gives himself
fully to the act, dropping all the pretenses and masks, the passion many would
be surprised to see he possesses. It’s all there, and Greg never grows tired of
it.
Counting Mycroft’s freckles when they’re lying side by side is his favourite
thing to do.
                                     * * *
The only times Mycroft feels anything is when he’s eating. Food becomes his
savior, his only pleasure, the one thing that will lift his spirits when he’s
feeling down. So Mycroft eats and eats and eats, until he realizes how much he
has eaten in one go. It’s so disgusting. The only way to feel better is to get
rid of the food he just ate. Throwing up fixes everything.
Mycroft hates his body and how it betrays him.
                                     * * *
Later on Greg wishes he could take it all back. How he was stupid and pushed
on, when Mycroft clearly told him to let things be. He has caused his lover so
much pain and anguish, over things neither of them have any control of.
One night, after a particularly vivid nightmare, it all comes out. Mycroft is
agitated, torn between keeping his worst memories to himself and telling
everything to Greg because of the trust between them. Greg embraces him,
telling him it was only a nightmare, and that’s when Mycroft snaps.
“It was not just a nightmare. It was my childhood.”
Words like “incest”, “sexual abuse”, ”eating disorder” are talked over and over
again. How Mycroft sacrificed himself in order to protect Sherlock. How Mycroft
turned their mother against her own, long-awaited younger son so that he
wouldn’t have to go through the same horrors he had to.
How he can never tell Sherlock how much he means to him, because it would mean
telling the truth. And truth is something Sherlock can never know.
The next time Sherlock insults Mycroft, Greg wishes Sherlock would know how
much his older brother truly loves him.
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